Team Ruth

I've had this idea about "care teams" floating around in my mind for a number of years. But in the last week I was reminded of the concept when a friend and co-worker found out that her mother’s cancer had recurred. She was thinking of things that needed to be done for her mother - and we started talking about her support system.

The first time I was aware that I had assembled a support team was when I was diagnosed with a serious illness a number of years ago. It wasn’t the first time I had created a team but it was the first one that I recognized. It wasn’t until I finished a yearlong fairly brutal treatment program, that I realized that I wouldn't have survived that year without my team.

This morning I found something I wrote the following year:

I am on the train going to Berkeley and realizing that once again life has taken an unexpected and serious turn. I’ve been think about “care teams” or whatever I’ve called it in my mind since I was diagnosed quite a while ago.

Mother seemed to do well last year when I was in treatment, however, the last three or four months, her memory is getting impaired and she is frustrated easily. But until very recently she kept her wonderful independent spirit and joy for life. Last night she was depressed and crying. It is time to put together another team.

It started last night at dinner with our close friends. My friend is also on my mother’s durable power of attorney for health care and has known her for over 25 years. They immediately offered to help in any way they could.

Friends took a break from work and got me to the train. Another close friend is emailing me on my Blackberry websites of independent and assisted living places in Sacramento – just in case.

That was the last time I wrote about it and subsequently, we did form a great team for my mother. She moved to Sacramento and she and I assembled the team. Doctor, therapist (briefly), key family members and friends, hairdresser, care giver, etc….all became part of “Team Ruth”. And we knew that she could rely on everyone because we were all part of that team. However, this is the first time I’ve called it Team Ruth. And most of the team was there two years later when she was home with hospice care before she passed away. I guess that you could say that Yolo Hospice was the final member to join the team.

I’ve always wanted to write a book or article about this notion………I’m sure I’m not the first to think of it…but today it is just ramblings.